The title isn't meant to talk about what I'm doing in the present moment on company time (you're reading it). I gave my company 14 hours yesterday and the day before that, and a few on Sunday. I was encouraged to hit 40 hours this week (I go on vacation tomorrow, please note the day--it is currently wednesday), which was apparently very kind of them seeing as I have a required 55 hours this week and next.
In case you didn't know, working 40 hours in three days (Plus a little weekend time) is something of a nightmare. Everything else in my life has been put on the wayside.
I guess what I'm trying to communicate here is that while I'm working hard for a very thankless and unfulfilling job (at least it has been for the past few weeks)...I'm hardly working on eating well. I'm more concerned about the fact that I've given up sleep (or rather, it's given up on me) and that I can't remember what day it is often.
Chadd did the most wonderful boyfriend thing this weekend. He booked a massage for me on Saturday at the four seasons. A body treatment AND a massage, to be precise. 80 minutes of bliss in a very swanky spa. After lunch out, we came home and I did exactly what one does after a massage and lunch...sleep. That night, we went to Fogo de Chao, the world famous brazillian steakhouse....and what can I say, the way to my heart is through a spa treatment and then multiple cuts of wonderfully cooked beef. Texas girls are pretty simple, it seems.
While we were seated at the restaurant, Chadd told me "this is a special occassion. eat whatever you want." Now, dont get me wrong, Chadd doesn't watch what I eat an harp on me for his own pleasure. I've enlisted him as my watchdog, which worked very well when we had the same schedule.
I will say, I've been decent about eating despite my horrible schedule. Remember my last post about the minus one pound weekend. I didnt' weigh in this week, but it's probably very similar to the last time I weighed in. Work takes away my time/desire to cook something.
I've been either not hungry, or craving pasta and grease. I never give into the grease--though Five Guys was very close to winning the battle last night--but the pasta, I do. I try to stick with a lot of lean cuisines and healthier sandwhiches and snacking.
Come to think of it, I eat better than I feel I do...but I know it's no where as regimented as it should be. That's how we get into trouble. We lose focus, then its not a priority, then we get out of the habit and before you know it, it's easy to push take out for three nights in a row under the mental rug.
I've done okay with it, in all honesty. Of course, I'd rather be spending my money on something else than food, I'd also rather go back to cooking. I enjoy cooking. It's very relaxing to me. This would also probably help me sleep.
If anyone has ever been a waiter or had a crazy busy job that requires extreme multitasking, then they'll understand how this goes. When you're a waiter, often times you have something called "waiter dreams." I didn't know that other people had them until I read some guy's blog about being a waiter in NYC and his friend asked him after he'd left the industry and found his way back, if he'd started having waiter dreams again.
Waiter dreams are unique. They're a very strange combination of things. Usually, the dreams aren't bad, but they tend to last all night, you can wake up and go right back to them. They're unusually realistic for dreams--at least 3-4 nights a week when I was a waitress, I'd have waiter dreams:
Drinks to table 101, dont' forget a side of ranch for table 112, and the two top in the corner is finally all here, must take their order. Don't slip in that puddle. Remember to grab the pitcher of beer from the bar, swing around and hey, tie your shoe, don't forget your pen is in your hair. Ed's the cook tonight, did my hostess finish wrapping silverware?
Almost never a bad dream. There was rarely a dream about chilling out at the bar with my friends after work or sitting at the hostess station. Always moving. I've been told it's because your brain is constantly juggling simultaneous tasks by bringing them into your short term memory--that second bucket where you have about 5 minutes to keep it there until you lose it...your brain likes to do a dump of those, much as you would defrag a computer. Boom. Waiter dreams.
That happens a lot now that I'm working this many hours for my day job and constantly trying to brainstorm and grow my new business. Rodan + Fields is by far the most energetic job I've ever had. I love it. Perhaps I should have known that I was always meant to be in sales (like my Dad) and own my own business (I think I had three of them when I was growing up). But I am constantly working (when I'm procrastinating with Deloitte work, I'm doing R+F stuff--today was a HUGE win over at Nordstrom's with a Chanel woman with friends in need of work)...and so my brain is constantly working on overdrive.
For the past three weeks, I've not been sleeping well, if at all. Last night, I got three hours. The past week, aside from this weekend (where Chadd and I went to sleep at a normal time), I haven't slept well. Lots of waiter dreams for R+F -- sending emails, having interviews, doing demos, etc.
I think this post probably lost it's purpose. Bottom line: working hard (when it's not something you love...aka, my day job) can make you hardly work on yourself. I am on a quest to figure out how to conquer that. But maybe that's the Holy Grail. Suggestions?