Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Booze and the Epic Morning Fail

Oh beer.

Beer has a ridiculous amount of calories.

Your fearless leader had an epic fail after her minor victory against office food yesterday.

As it grew later and later, the troops grew restless and beer was supplied.

I had a few. Two.

Calories per beer I had last night: 153/12 oz.

Just two of those constitutes dinner. (And I also had dinner)

The good news here is that the hero of our tale only had two beers.

This is my rule because I've learned what happens the next day after more than two drinks, and no, it's not a hangover, though I'm sure that happens. It's that horrible bloated feeling. I like waking up, feeling thin and awake. Not tired and fat. Two beers is right at that line, but not over it. I wake up feeling nothing more than tired, which I would like to chalk up to being at the office from 6:30am to 9:30 last night.

This morning, because I was running late, I didn't eat breakfast, which was dumb. I have a very tempermental blood sugar levels...so I had a pesto veggie omelet thing. It sounds healthy, but from what I gather, anything that sounds healthy that isnt' in a pure form (hard boiled egg, fruit, vegetables). It's 740 calories not healthy.

This sounds horrible, and it is. But it's okay because I'm going back to Cosi for lunch and having a huge salad for dinner. Skip the cheese and the dressing (dip your fork tongs in for minimal calories, max taste) and you've got 228 for a salad.

Tonight, I'll be so tired I'll probably just have a salad at home, looking at my calculations for a small salad that I make at home...you get 61 calories, take out my dressing and use the dip method, we're down to 24 calories.

Our grand total for the day:

740 - Omelet sandwhich of doom
083 - Fruit salad
019 - Coffee
228 - salad at lunch
061 - salad for dinner

Total: 1131

Not bad, friends, considering I'm aiming for 1300 a day. It'll take off some of the edge from those two beers and fatty dinner last night.

I'm sure you're thinking that "for someone who counts calories, she must be panicking, she's probably freaking out."

You can assume otherwise, but I'm not really freaking out. I'm a bit disappointed in myself because I totally blew through that decision gate that said "this isn't going to be good. you'll feel bloated and sleepy all day tomorrow."

But it's almost a relief, because here's the deal. I was waiting to screw up. That sounds like I can't control my actions or that I was sabotaging myself, but think of it like this. When you first learn to ski or skate or anything that requires balance, the biggest fear is falling. But often times, once you fall, you go "that wasn't that bad, okay, next time I will have more confidence" and you fall less as your confidence builds. It's a weird circular system.

Now that I've really, totally blown it, I can readjust, I can better prepare and I know that I won't lose my mind over it. It's also something that will happen again. You can't not have that piece of pie that great aunt norma slaved over. You certinaly cannot refuse your soon to be mother in law's butter glazed, gravy coated, and deep fried chicken. And if you're stuck in a long meeting where they serve lunch (which happens to be chinese food)...you're going to eat.

Aside from cravings, none of us are 100% in control of what food is available to us. And for that matter, it probably shouldn't be. That's why I still go out and have lunch with my friends. It's why I let the office buy me lunch (and beer and dinner)...because let's face it. Neurosis of food is neurosis of food, even if you're losing weight.

And like I've said. I love food more than almost anything. And I don't like being neurotic about love.

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