The Trouble with Results

I had the blown up ego and even took a picture, but it looked a little 14 year old naive myspace user, so I ditched the idea of posting pictures of my situation.  I also have sore abs due to the fact that I spent over an hour walking around flexing. 

In other news, I want to talk about results today. I've had a few conversations with a friend of mine (who may have convinced me into a three way pact with the devil to do another marathon and my first ironman...hahah, I know, right?) about results.  We'll call them...WB for work buddy.  WB's currently doing something called The Insanity Workout, which actually legitimately makes me tired to think about, but WB's been very patient indulging my fits of whining. 

Bottom line.  K and Chadd have both noticed my weight loss and WB promises me that if we were in the same city, they'd have noticed too.

Basically, the other day, when I hit 11 pounds of weight loss, I went "dammit, why hasn't someone said something?"  K suggested that I'm around her and Chadd most of the time and they noticed.  My coworkers, dude!  We are three to a cube in our client's office!  I see them more than her and Chadd combined!

The other possibility, which is legit, is that since I work in a very conservative environment, my clothes just really aren't showing it (and most of my weight loss has been around my midsection and thighs). 

Regardless.  I just wanted someone to be like "hey, you look like you've really slimmed down!" and I'd be all like "boom, look at my situation!" except not because that might get me fired.  The point is, I have to remind myself that there's a fine line between losing for myself and losing for praise.  Praise is nice, the actual loss is a far better gift since it's healthy/life lengthening.  Self praise should and needs to be a bigger part of my routine.  Every woman out there rips on herself entirely too much.  I'm seriously guilty of it, and despite my dad's never ending quest to get me to kill that inner mean voice (he doesn't like or allow self-deprecating comments, which I've always thought is one of the best dad-things he's done), it's pretty persistent.

My solution is this.  I will start telling myself one positive thing a day and I'm not talking "hey, nice hair."  More like "damn girl, your arms are getting toned!" in my very very white girl ghetto voice.  I will also freely tell people about my success (granted, at appropriate times).  I will also build and maintain a good support group.  Everyone needs outside input, so find the group that is likely to give it to you (honest feedback) and ask for their support.  They'll give it.

So that's part one of the results discussion.  The second part is not about recognition of results, but more about the effect of results.

I am guilty of the yo-yo, as I've discussed before, but the real issue is that at a certain point, we're really happy with what we've done and the next x pounds are part of the goal...but damn, we have a situation!  I can kick back and relax, right?  Yeah, no.  I do that every time.  I feel like counting my calories and working out and generally being fitness minded is great, but it's only around when I want to lose weight.  I know that most of America struggles with this issue.  We feel like we've done without or we've adjusted our schedule--temporarily.  Except that's not how this works.  You go right back up if you treat this is a temporary lifestyle.

I think I was on the dangerous edge of getting there.  Two parties this weekend, each with their share of fatty foods and alcohol.  I'm here, teetering on the edge of being close to the next set of ten pounds and I'm like...I've been so good, I can do a splurge weekend.  Yeah, no.  I can plan for the parties, have a slice of pizza, a drink or two, then call it quits.  Soooo hard to reel ones self back in, isn't it?

I say I WAS on the dangerous edge.  Last night, I went to the gym and had my body fat percentage measured.  Now, not to make excuses here, but the guy said that they only use the scale, which is apparently the least accurate means of measuring body fat.  But still.  The number on that scale was horrifying.  I might have lost 11 pounds, but that didn't mean that my body fat was gone.  It meant that I must have been a lot worse off than I'd thought.  I shudder to think about what would have happened without my Pact buddy. 

I was so upset by the % last night that I couldn't remember my weight. He said I'd lost a pound but I couldn't remember what I told him I was the week before.

So this morning, at a more appropriate time (after cycle, before I'd eaten), I stepped on the scale at my gym and weighed in. You guys, I lost 1.75 pounds since Sunday.  I had gained a half pound in Vegas, which I think is a victory, and then lost 1.75.  Woohoo!  I have moved from the 1X0's to the 1(X-1)0's!  ie, if I were in the 180s, I'd have slipped into the 170s. 

I am officially 9 pounds away from my original goal weight.  13 pounds lost (well, 12.75)!  Sometimes that number seems huge and sometimes, inconsequential.  I told my Pact buddy that I added a new goal to my weight loss--a body fat percentage change of 7%, then I'd reassess. 

Bottom line:
- Surround yourself with a good support group and stay positive yourself.
- Don't be satisfied with results.  Keep going or maintain.  Never slide back!